Preparing for Your Autistic Child’s Adult Life
Apr 01, 2018 06:18PM ● By Fredericksburg Parent Staff
Area resources and support groups help parents embrace the future
Parents of a child on the autism spectrum may have concerns about what life may be like once their child becomes an adult. Preparation and seeking out available resources are key.
Kim Lett, program coordinator and deputy director of the DisAbility Resource Center in Fredericksburg, has a 30-year-old autistic son. She fretted for his future as he began transitioning from school eight years ago.
Lett’s worries included what skills her son would need to care for himself as well as who would assist him with what he isn’t able to do on his own; when and how he would find employment or what he would do if he doesn’t find work in addition to how he would support himself financially; where he would live; and if he would have a support system beyond his family.
These are fears of any parent of a child with a significant disability,” Lett says.
Jessica Porter, the mother of a teenaged boy with autism, shares the same feelings.
“My son is currently 14, but adulthood still weighs on me,” Porter says. “What will his life be like? Will he enjoy all life has to offer? Will his social circle always only be his grandmother and me? What level of independence will he have?”
Porter turned to an online support group to express her thoughts and emotions.
“It’s just nice to vent to those who may be in a similar situation,” she says. “Having friends with children on the spectrum helps, too, knowing that you are not alone.”
Like Lett, Porter also wonders about employment opportunities for her son.
“I worry about what his day will be like,” Porter says. “Will he want and have a job? A job that actually benefits him, not one where he earns pennies an hour? Will he be able to go anywhere independently, or will he always need someone right with him?”
Lett recommends that moms and dads with the same questions about their special needs child turn to local resources for help. The DisAbility Resource Center, which will celebrate its 25th anniversary this year, is a center for independent living that serves people of all ages with disabilities and their families.
“Learn as much as you can about transition—employment, education, housing, finances, long-term care services, Social Security, and other state and federal benefits—as early as you can,” Lett suggests. “Go to workshops, trainings and conferences to learn and keep abreast of what is available to help support your child and their goals as they get older.”
Parents should also be mindful that every child with special needs is different.
“When talking about transition, it’s important to remember that autism is a spectrum,” said Elizabeth Roy, executive director of the Autism Society of Northern Virginia. “Each individual will have unique needs and so each individual’s transition will look different. Equally important is keeping in mind that people change. Transition plans should be detailed enough that they can be used as a road map but flexible enough that they can adapt to an individual’s changing needs.”
While it can be overwhelming to anticipate what the future holds for your child, Porter recommends taking a breather every now and then and simply relish the present.
“I try to enjoy my son for who he is,” Porter says. “Take it one day at a time. And, if that is too much, then one minute at a time.”