I don't get moved to tears very easily. My husband mentioned how strong I am whilst giving a speech at our wedding. He was tearing up and he felt it necessary to call attention to the fact that I did not shed a tear. HELLO...I just married the man of my dreams, what was there to cry about?!
ANYWAY, this week has been tearful for me and I'm dreading Monday morning. We got off to a great start on the bus for the first day of school. I shed many tears like any mom would, sending off her baby on the bus for the first time. However, my son Rishi left excited and his sister and I went about our day until the bus came back that afternoon, an hour late I might add.
He disembarked exhausted and teary-eyed. He did not like school. He hated it. It was too loud, there were too many people, he could not hear himself think, "even the playground was not fun"...his description reminded me of prison movies...loud, crowd, crazy, chaos. I was concerned and immediately wrote an email to the teacher and called a neighbor, who works at the school and stopped by the school. In my haste, I didn’t realize that I wore the same dress (freshly laundered!) that I had just worn a few days earlier to orientation. I realized it when I was sitting in the front office. Embarrassing but not important in the great scheme of things!
The second day was awful, my husband and I practically had to hold Rishi down to get him dressed, the only reason we managed to get him out the door was because he had forgotten his lunchbox on the bus the day prior and he wanted to retrieve it. We walked to the bus and as it pulled up he turned to run home.
My husband had to chase him down the sidewalk while the bus waited; Rishi was crying as he was carried on to the bus, I was crying...it was awful. The teacher emailed me back to say that he was having a rough time and keeping to himself mostly. She said he had asked to go home at 9:30 am on the first day of school, my poor baby.
My kind neighbor Betsi emailed me to tell me that she would check up on him. I had another neighbor who mentioned having lunch with her kids and I asked her to go and say hi to him...all came back to report he was having a hard time. It was brutal to hear.
I busied myself with a Costco trip to shop for ingredients for two huge orders for the weekend, a wedding cake and a cake for a little girl having a party at a farm. The baking would keep me busy and sane, I knew that when I accepted the orders. I got another order mid-way through the week which I turned down, I was going for sane not overwhelmed. I ignored most other phone calls not wanting to repeat the story of our awful week. It certainly did not resemble the Facebook photos I posted on his first day heading off to school.
The third day we sent him off with the promise that Daddy would join him for lunch. It was another struggle getting him out the door but as promised, his dad brought him lunch and brightened up his day. The teachers, now fully aware of our concerns, spent more time talking with him and agreed to get him some books on subjects he likes. He made a friend, Ian who said he would help him break out of school, they could run out and tell the bus driver to take them home. He came back happy that day knowing he had a breakout plan.
On the final day of this interminable week, Rishi told me that he was only going to school because it's library day and next week he wants to find a new school that is "not so long." He came home and told me that he'll cry all day if I make him go back. I finished up the farm cake and delivered it on Friday. It was a welcome distraction and my favorite kind of cake to make...happy and fun.
On Saturday morning, we headed down for breakfast; Rishi again said he would cry all day if I made him go to school. I told him it's the weekend so we'll talk about school later. The wedding cake took up most of the morning and today (Sunday) is an at-home day with family, my son's favorite way to spend time.
Rishi has asked to go back to preschool, he wants to learn from home, he wants to have a short school day...I now remember hearing rumblings when I was pregnant about half-day Kindergarten, I didn't pay much attention but those conversations I tuned out then, are coming back clearly now! I'm dreading Monday morning, I hope it won't be another tearful one.